Saturday [The Night Owl...]

"we should all do what, in the long run, gives us joy,
even if it is only picking grapes or sorting the laundry."
-e.b.white.


joy.
what an idea.
i feel as though sometimes its entirely elusive. foggy. distant. ungraspable.
and then, suddenly, sneakily, unexpectedly,
joy creeps in.

it's impressive really,the intensity with which one can find oneself overwhelmed,
caught off guard


by happiness.



but then, the pieces of your life puzzle slowly begin to fit together,
a picture forms,
you notice things that were not there before,
leave behind fears and give yourself over to abandon.

and somewhere, in amongst the living and the dream making and the hard work you find
an inexplicable sensation of contentment.

happiness isn't always hard to find.

the problem is usually that we look in all the wrong places.

i spent the weekend on a farm in the middle of nowhere.
driving along winding steep roads.
green on either side.
fog descending on the mountain peaks.
dinner in a valley.
antique fairs and handmade shopping.

i am in love.
i have moved on.
i am grateful for the past two years because i know nothing will ever be so bad again.


and you, you are nothing but a distant memory..

i'm alright, i don't mind, i'm just running into something bigger
than the something i left behind...